Making a difference in other people’s life.

Being Yourself – It’s a lot More Fun.

One of the greatest tragedies of life and a source of much suffering is that so many of us are disconnected from who we really are and do not believe in ourselves. We compromise ourselves and our integrity when we don’t live in harmony with our own being. We all mostly live acting out a script programmed into us by others.

Let me summarize Thomas Troward: “Being yourself. It has at least the merit of simplicity, for it must surely be easier to be oneself than to be something or somebody else. Yet that is what so many are constantly trying to do; the self that is their own is not good enough for them so they are always trying to go one better than what God has made them with endless strain and struggle as the consequence.”

I am an identical twin. My brother is 15 minutes older. We were brought up as being the same in everything we did. We are very good brothers. To review our early programming  by others was even harder. Peter started earlier than I did. We are both still learning. Being yourself was not an option.

We learn from a young age that we are not quite good enough. In order to be accepted and loved we have to behave in certain ways. This adds to the struggle to realize our own identity.

Thomas Troward again: “The only possible way of progress is by following an ideal that is always a stage ahead of us – but the mistake is in not seeing that its attainment is a matter of growth, and that growth must be the expansion of something that already exists in us, and therefore implies our being what we are and where we are as a starting point. This growth is a continuous process, and we cannot do next month’s growth without first doing this months.”

Being yourself requires courage. There are always people ready to knock you down. The system pays lip service to individualism, but doesn’t like people who go against the grain. How much of your behavior is authentic and how much is conditioned response.

To live truly is to live from the heart – to know what’s important to us, what we love and what brings us joy, and to express that in every way we can. If we are to be free, the way we choose to live has to be real, immediate and vital  – from the heart.

Don’t be consumed by the system. Don’t let the system tell you who you are or who you should be because it doesn’t know. Neither do other people no matter how well intentioned.

In being yourself the only person who can tell you who you are, is you.

Walter Anderson said: ” Our lives improve only when we take chances, and the first and most difficult risk we can take is to be honest with ourselves.”


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5 Responses

  1. Stephen, you have an interesting post here. I agree we need to definitely learn to be authentic to ourselves and not just try to please others in our behaviors. We are the one who has to live with ourself, and we need to be true to that. -Shirley

  2. Great post! You are right, being yourself takes courage. It’s not an easy thing to stand up for what you value and believe and go against the grain. But, if we want to be truly valued and accepted, the only way is to be ourselves. Otherwise, who are they really accepting? Do you ever read books by Brene Brown? She has so many good books on being authentic and vulnerable. Thanks for an inspiring post!

  3. Very inspiring post. I agree about not letting the system tell you who you are, trust in your inner self and work towards your future and things will pay off greatly. Great article.

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